Not Another Unicorn Story

I know what you're thinking. But don't worry, I'm not going to tell you another unicorn story! Nothing about a magical horse with a neon pink mane, galloping through an extraordinary world full of wonder. I definitely won't tell you about the miraculous Fountain of Joy or the rainbow poops as fluffy as whipped cream. And I promise not to say a word about any mischievous gnomes named Nestor. You insist? Pfff, fine, all right . . .